5 Things I Wish I Would Have Known Before my Wedding.
1. Now is not the time to be nice. If you’re like me and can sometimes have somewhat of a doormat personality–you’re gonna need to dig real deep and find your inner boxing gloves.
Here are some real life examples where it’s not the time to just be nice and let someone walk all over you. Maybe these happened…maybe I just have a really good imagination.
- When one of your bridesmaids has her dress altered six inches shorter than the rest of the group because “it makes her legs look better.”
- When someone calls to tell you they think your shower idea is stupid and they have a better idea for a shower…the morning of your wedding shower.
- When someone gets to your wedding 20 minutes late and then bangs on the door to be let in as you are about to walk down the aisle.
- Any instance where someone tells you that you need to change something about your wedding, and you don’t want to.
2. People are going to let you down…and that’s okay. Because people are also going to surprise you with how great they are. Here’s the deal: there are some people that you’re going to expect a lot of, and they’re just not going to come through. There will be people you expect to be a part of your day that will not even make it to your wedding. And you will feel very protective and hurt, thinking, “But this is MY WEDDING! How could you not drop everything in your life to make it perfect?!”
But then there will also be people who really pull together to make sure you have the most amazing day ever. And those people are the best.
3. Don’t answer your phone the day of. Better yet, hand it off to someone else. I got so many texts the morning of my wedding. Some were sweet congratulations, but some were things I just did not need to be worrying about–like the 85 people who texted me asking what they should wear.
Just hand it off to someone you trust to tell you if there is actually something you need to see…not just your ex-boyfriend saying he misses you or someone asking if they can give a speech.
4. You really should eat. I’m going to confess something here. The morning of my wedding, I ate McDonalds.
Yep.
McDonalds.
Never mind that we were right by Panera, and I could have had a smoothie or a dainty little quiche. I needed a hash brown, dangit. I will never forget my mom calling my dad and saying, “She decided she wants McDonalds!” In the same way that she had said, “She decided she wants this wedding dress!”
My dad came to the rescue with the hash browns, and as we were making sure everything was set up perfectly, we were shoving our faces with McDonalds. We’re the classiest, let me just tell you.
But seriously: You need to eat on the day of your wedding. I promise you will still fit in your wedding dress, no matter what you eat. I tested that theory out for you. You’re welcome.
5. If you want it at your wedding, you should have it at your wedding.
My wedding was on December 29th. These were my colors:
If you want it, you should have it. Colors, food, music, all of it. If you don’t want it, don’t put it in your wedding. Everyone is going to have an opinion and you should probably just smile and nod and then do whatever you want, because it’s not their wedding.
What would you add to this list?
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I 100% have a doormat personality. I can't help it!
I love this list though. š
Love this list! I feel like you can get away with really bright colors when you're getting married somewhere warm, even if it is December 29th š
I am 100% in favour of the "just say 'no'" rule. YES. It's your day, they're your wishes, don't let anyone muss that up. (I made a few compromises that make me unhappy, because I am, also, a doormat. Or was. I was a doormat. I'm learning my lesson.) Great post and stunning wedding. Just stunning. Those colours! I love that you did that. So pretty and fun and smile-making.
Great post! Definitely being able to say no when you want is important. There were people shocked that I wasn't doing certain things/traditions/whatever… and I didn't owe them an explanation and soon I realized that! Once I stopped feeling like I needed to justify everything I did, I enjoyed it a lot more! We went to Panera for an early lunch before our wedding… I definitely got a larrrrrrge helping of mac n' cheese š
This is maybe my favorite wedding post ever. I can relate to the first one so much and literally had some of those things happen to me! I love the colors you chose for your wedding!
Great advice! The overarching message seems to be that it's your wedding day so you should do whatever you want! Hopefully you're only getting married once, there is no reason not to get McDonalds if you want McDonalds!
Good to know for someday!
Hmm, I would say that not listening to others and doing what YOU want! I really wish I would have eloped, I look back now and it is a regret because my wedding was thrown together and was stressful. Plus, I was young and let people sway me. Also, have a detailed plan of what you like and go wot your vision, because so many people like to do what they want and it is your wedding;0
I have to 110% agree with this list. I had to have what some would call a "bridezilla" moment this week, and in the end it was just about me reminding people that this is our big day. It makes me so sad that people aren't who I thought they were, but things happen.
YES TO ALL OF THESE THINGS!!!!
Totally agree 110%! And I totally had Chick-Fil-A, on the floor of our ballroom while it was being decorated. I can join you in all the classiness! Oh, and I have to admit.. I totally checked out the lengths of the bridesmaid's dresses for the "hemmed" culprit! lol
me too!!
Hahaha I love it! Sometimes there is just nothing that will do but McDonald's! And I think I can see which girl had her dress hemmed haha Some people need to learn to save their ideas and opinions for their own wedding.
I agree 100% with everything you said. Yes yes yes to this list!
This is a great read for me for my future wedding. I, too, have more of a doormat personality, so being firm can sometimes be a little hard for me. Thanks for the encouragement.
Great post and so true lady. It's incredible who's there for you that you don't expect to be and who lets you down when they don't even show up. I was super lucky with my bridal party because everyone was so amazing. And my husband and I were both on the same page of doing what we wanted, not what everyone told us to do. Love that you got Mickey D's. I was going to do a starbucks run but my mom had a brunch for everyone and it was perfect for me.
I totally found the bmaid culprit…who does that?
I nearly starved on my wedding day and my phone was glued to my hand in a really bad way. I had no help so I didn't get to enjoy my day so that's one thing I would have. GET HELP. Even if it's not a wedding planner it just needs to be someone who knows as much about your wedding day as you do so they can help out the day of. Any assistance on that day is crucial.
Great list, I agree with all of them!
I love this list!!! And I completely agree that you should have whatever you want at your wedding!! It is YOUR wedding and no one can tell you what is right or wrong.
I ate McDonalds for lunch that day! It was probably an hour before I was in my dress because I was was too rushed for anything else and then I felt icky! Great list!
Love this post! This is a great reminder, if it ever happens, to not give in when it comes to your special day. And that yes, McD's is amazing enough for a wedding day breakfast! xoxo, ganeeban
What a great post! All of these things are so important to remember. I especially like the last one – that, combined with the first one, caused some aspects of my wedding to not be exactly what I wanted, and if I could go back I'd change them in a heartbeat! Also I totally had Chik-fil-a for breakfast the morning of my wedding, no shame in my game!
Your colors are beautiful, especially with the palm trees in the background! I'm glad you paired the honest truth that people will let you down with the uplifting idea that people will surprise you with their wonderfulness, too.
Oh my gosh 1 and 2 are SO applicable to how my wedding went! As for 3, I put together a cheat sheet on Microsoft excel with all our vendors, all the numbers and times they were show up to which place. I gave the sheets to the people who would be calling to ask "When is this person supposed to show up and what if they're not here?" so that I wouldn't stress. I gave them my aunt/day-of coordinator's number in case they had questions š
I love this list! It's all true!
Agree with not answering your phone. Good idea on the McDonald's.
All of your points in #1… just picture me snapping my fingers while saying "Oh no she didn't!" My goodness, Chelsea! gah! I do wish someone would have told me to eat throughout the day. Better yet, someone should have just fed me š
Love this!! I so had McDonald's on the day of our wedding too!! I wasn't that hungry but knew I needed something!
ha! So true! The only thing I would add to this, is making sure you have one friend who isn't part of the bridal party at all to sporadically check up on you throughout the day. I never asked, but several of my friends did this and it was a LIFESAVER. They made sure I had water when it was hot and got a chance to eat at the reception.
xox
giedre
Love this list! I'm definitely going to remember this for my wedding, October 3.
Great post! I can't believe those things (or some of those things? we'll never know haha) actually happened to you before/during your wedding! Some people are so inconsiderate and/or clueless. Weirdly enough, I don't think I'm usually a doormat (but maybe I am?) but I was totally a doormat about my wedding. But honestly, it was because I didn't really care that much about the details; I just wanted to look good and dance the night away haha. I've actually been wanting to write a post about this "not-caring" part of my experience for a while, but I'm just nervous it will come out wrong and offend former or future brides, so I've been holding back. We'll see if I ever get brave enough to hit publish! š And P.S. – Eating is SO important. We didn't have McDonalds that morning, but we did go through the drive-through on the way back to our hotel after the reception. The woman in the window was like, "Um, did you just get married?" š
I had Burger King before my wedding š
love the wedding colors… it's tropical, fun, and totally unique. who cares what anyone else says. =)
I didn't have to worry about the phone issue – I didn't have a smart phone yet! And yes, #4 is so important. You don't want to be the bride that passed out (I was at a wedding where one of the bridesmaids fainted on stage – she probably hadn't eaten anything).
Great list! I am working on some of those, as I tend to put others before me.
P.S. love that wedding picture! So colorful!
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Amazing post and I can not believe that one of your bridesmaid altered her dress that much, although I can not blame anyone for wanting to show off some leg!!! Also amazing colors for the dresses!!!
this is great! I've already prepared myself for people letting me down. And I'm dying at the bridesmaid who altered her dress too short. Yikes!