Two Months of Marriage.
As of tomorrow, I will have been married for two entire
months!
months!
Except for the fact that it’s February, and there is no 29th.
So no technical anniversary this month. Totally not fair, February. Totally not fair.
Anyway, in the spirit of being married and such, I thought
I’d write a post about the things I’ve learned in two months of marriage.
I’d write a post about the things I’ve learned in two months of marriage.
1. Your life pre-marriage does not end.
This can be one of the bad things about a wedding. In the words of one of my bridesmaids,
“If you’re not careful, in can turn into sort of a funeral.” While my wedding was no funeral, I was
worried that because I was getting married that nothing would be the same
anymore. The morning of my
wedding, I had a panic attack saying goodbye to my dog because I felt like I
was never going to see him again. {If
you’ve read my blog at all, you know I am obsessed with my dog.}
“If you’re not careful, in can turn into sort of a funeral.” While my wedding was no funeral, I was
worried that because I was getting married that nothing would be the same
anymore. The morning of my
wedding, I had a panic attack saying goodbye to my dog because I felt like I
was never going to see him again. {If
you’ve read my blog at all, you know I am obsessed with my dog.}
Fast forward two months and I’ve already visited him several
times. The same with the rest of
the things in my life.
times. The same with the rest of
the things in my life.
My old room is still there.
My family is still the same and we are still just as close.
I still talk to my friends.
My life did not end, it just expanded. I added a wonderful new part, but that
doesn’t mean everything pre-wedding went away.
doesn’t mean everything pre-wedding went away.
2. Your differences do not magically go away.
I am the polar opposite of my husband. He is in medschool to be a doctor. I want to be a writer. That pretty much says it all. He can stay up late studying and run on
five hours of sleep and a cup of coffee.
I can not. He is incredibly
outgoing and I am forever introverted.
five hours of sleep and a cup of coffee.
I can not. He is incredibly
outgoing and I am forever introverted.
The list of our differences go on and on, and for some
reason I thought that once we got married, all of those would somehow merge
into all of these awesome things that we had in common.
reason I thought that once we got married, all of those would somehow merge
into all of these awesome things that we had in common.
They did not.
If you are different before you get married, you will be
different after you get married.
Not that this is a bad thing.
I happen to think that being different is a wonderful thing. Opposites attract and all of that,
right? It just takes a little
extra work, but what doesn’t?
different after you get married.
Not that this is a bad thing.
I happen to think that being different is a wonderful thing. Opposites attract and all of that,
right? It just takes a little
extra work, but what doesn’t?
3. You will not transform into Martha Stewart.
This one is kind of a bummer. My mom is the most domestic person I know, so I thought that
surely once I got married, I would magically inherit all of that.
surely once I got married, I would magically inherit all of that.
False.
My house is still not unpacked.
When I clean, you can’t even tell the next day.
I’ve ruined many a dinner already.
But you know what? I’m learning.
And I’m having a heck of a good time doing so.
4. You are still your own person.
I am still me.
I still want the same things I did before I walked down the aisle. I still want to chase after my dream of
being a writer. I still want to
make a difference in the world.
Getting married did not mean I had to give up those dreams. It meant that I live with someone who
supports my dreams everyday, and I get to do the same for him. Yes, we are growing as a couple. But I’m still growing as a person, too.
I still want the same things I did before I walked down the aisle. I still want to chase after my dream of
being a writer. I still want to
make a difference in the world.
Getting married did not mean I had to give up those dreams. It meant that I live with someone who
supports my dreams everyday, and I get to do the same for him. Yes, we are growing as a couple. But I’m still growing as a person, too.
I love being married.
I love eating dinner with my best friend every night. I love getting to laugh with him
everyday, knowing I get to do this for the rest of my life. It’s a really, really cool feeling.
I love eating dinner with my best friend every night. I love getting to laugh with him
everyday, knowing I get to do this for the rest of my life. It’s a really, really cool feeling.
Marriage has already been really hard. It has already been really great. It has already taught me so much about
myself. I can’t imagine how much I
will have learned by next year, or five years from now, or in twenty years. But for now, I’m loving it. I’m enjoying everyday of this amazing
gift God has given to me.
myself. I can’t imagine how much I
will have learned by next year, or five years from now, or in twenty years. But for now, I’m loving it. I’m enjoying everyday of this amazing
gift God has given to me.
It really is wonderful.
xo,
Chels
xo,
Chels
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i wrote a post just like this a couple weeks after I got married and it is so fun reading your thoughts! ( http://www.untilonlyloveremains.com/2012/09/two-weeks-in-things-that-ive-learned.html )
my husband and i are the opposite! i am extremely outgoing and he is forever introverted 😉 we have had to learn to compromise on weekend plans – something social and something "restful' – usually I just let him have his time while i catch up with other friends!
marriage is a blessing because it is living with your best friend! but you are still you and you still have a life and it is fun to know you can go out work, have coffee with friends, visit your parents, and always come home to your best friend!
I can't wait to read your post! Thanks for sharing the link!
Aww, so sweet! Wait, the Mother Stewart thing doesn't work?! Bummer…
I adore your wedding dress!!
I know, right?! SUCH a bummer!
And thank you so much! It was literally my dream dress.
Such a cute picture! Our anniversary is Oct. 29, so no monthly anniversary for us in February either, which I totally did not even think of until I read your post!!!
Shannon
[ lifeofpoole.blogspot.com ]
No fair for us 29th-ers!
I love this. I'm not married, or even anywhere close, but this advice is wonderful. Even just to know for future reference. I love that you want to be a writer- I want to be an editor. (:
Thanks for the follow, by the way. I'm now a follower of your beautiful blog as well!
Thank you! I happen to think editors are pretty cool people! Maybe we'll even work together someday 🙂
those are all SO true!!! marriage is great but it is work & always will be. it is hard sharing your life with someone but great as well. congrats on the two months!! i just hit my 1 1/2 year mark!
new follower 🙂
http://www.fivefootseven.com
congratulations to you for your year and a half! and I agree, hard work, but so worth it.
This is such a cute post! 🙂 Very true!Great insight! 🙂
xoxoxo,
Carmina
http://www.cjoyhughes.blogspot.com
thanks so much, Carmina!
I learned many of these same lessons my first few months of marriage. Now, {nearly} five years later, I continue to learn. That is one of the beauties of marriage – it's always interesting 🙂 and as you learn more about your spouse, you learn more about yourself (perhaps a cliche, but a true one)
I can only imagine how many more things will be added to this list by the time I've been married for five years. And yeah, that's definitely a cliche that's absolutely true.
thanks for your sweet words 🙂
Such a lovely post. I also got married recently, almost three months ago =) And I can really relate with what you wrote <3