As of tomorrow, the first month of 2019 will come to an end. I hope it has been SO good to you. I hope you’ve stayed on track with any resolutions you’ve had. If, like me, you decided this year was less about resolutions and more about just living, I hope you’ve survived AND thrived. But if you haven’t, and you’ve failed on all fronts, IT. IS. OKAY.
January does not dictate your whole year. 2019 has plenty more days to be so good for you. You’ve got hundreds of chances left to be a champion. You’ve got this.
Also, a personal opinion: Lifelong resolutions are way better than yearly resolutions. Here are a few I think we should all have:
Show more kindness. || It takes SO LITTLE to be kind. It makes such a big difference – both to you and to those you’re showing kindness to.
Stop assuming others’ motives. || If you’re an anxious person, listen to me: Stop assuming the motives of other people. Stop assigning reasons to why they didn’t text you back. Stop saddling them with opinions they’ve never told you being the reason they couldn’t meet you for coffee. Stop assuming that the actions of others are motivated by you. If you are anything like me, this is so hard. But it’s worth trying!
Try to see others’ points of view. || I’m gonna be open here: This is new for me. I hate confrontation, so when I have a complete opposite point of view as someone else, I tend to just not talk about it. Why rock the boat, you know? But that’s dumb. Even if you disagree on deep things, it helps to put yourself in others’ shoes and try to see where they’re coming from and why they may feel that way. It doesn’t mean you’re changing your views, it means you’re being a more empathetic human being.
Drink more water. || Just do it. It fixes basically everything.
Love hard. || Love is the most beautiful thing we have. But love can also hurt. Romantic love, friend love, family love…loving hard and full opens yourself up in a way that leaves you vulnerable. It brings your heart to the surface where it is more easily injured. And after a few of those injuries-be it from a romantic partner or a friendship ending or a family tragedy-the instinct to love from a distance, to love with arms crossed, to love only on a surface level can kick in. Don’t give in. Life is short. Love hard. It hurts sometimes, but the good outweighs the bad, I promise.
Live abundantly. || I’ve been thinking so much about this. There’s a verse in the Bible that says Jesus came so that we would have not only life, but abundant life. Even if we have different faiths, I think abundant life is something we should all strive for. What fills you up? What is it that, when you do it, you think, “this! this is what it’s about!” What makes your life feel the most abundant? More of that.
Stop breaking promises to yourself. || Look, I don’t mean the way that on Friday, you swore you’d clean out the laundry room over the weekend, but then you got sucked in to a really good book and read all weekend instead. I’m talking about promises like, I will take better care of myself. I will stand up for myself. I will stop letting people walk all over me. I will make time for the things I love. Those promises. They’re important, don’t break them.
Make room for the things you love. || I like to think of this in terms of weekends. If you’ve worked all week, what’s your ideal weekend? Time with your people? Time alone? Projects? Books? Movies? Parties? We don’t all have weekends off, but we do all get little pockets of time here and there that we get to choose how to fill. Whatever your “weekends” are, how to you want to fill those?
What’s a lifelong resolution you have?